Vital Signs

Death Before Dying: … A Love Experience

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I’ve got to get to the surface for some air. Why is it taking me so long to get to my head out of the water? I am stroking as hard as I can. I need to break through to the surface for some air, and I need it now!

Finally, my head breaks the surface of the water! I am coughing, choking and trying to scream for help, but no sound comes out. I need to breathe now, but I’m sucking in more water than air, my lungs are filling up with water … they feel like they’re going to bust. Frantically, I look across the surface of the water for the raft … there it is, but it’s still quite far away … I’ll never make it! Hey, why is everybody just standing around? No, wait, a couple of guys are waving at me … don’t they realize that I am drowning! There I finally said it, I am drowning! I am going to die!

No one is coming to help me! I can’t keep my head above the water! Down I go again … this time deeper than before! Hell, I’ve got to get more air! I’ve got to get my head out of this damn water!

Why can’t I move my arms? Oh God, they feel like lead pipes, it’s so hard to move them, I sinking like a rock. The pain, the excruciating pain is in my chest and arms now! I’ve never thought there could be pain like this. I need air! I need air! I’ve got to get my head out of the water!

Oh God, I’m sinking deeper and deeper. I can’t move my arms any more, the pain is unbearable, every muscle in my body is screaming out with pain. Pain! Pain! And more pain! I can’t stand it any more! I’m still sinking, and it’s getting darker and darker … now it’s black, I can’t see anything! Oh my God, I can’t see! Am I blind?

My ears, there’s pain in my ears. It feels like someone is sticking an ice pick in them! The ringing is deafening, it feels like my brain is going to explode! I’m still falling into this black hole, and it’s freezing down here. My whole body is trembling with freezing cold, with freezing pain … Oh God, where in the hell am I going?

I am still slowly sinking into this freezing black hole, it’s lasting forever … wait … I feel something. They’re slimy and cold! They must be the weeds at the bottom of the lake. I’m getting tangled in the weeds. I’m struggling with the weeds, God they feel horrible, and it’s like I’ve fallen into a freezing snake pit! I’m still dropping down!

I stop sinking! I’m at the bottom. I reach down with my frozen hands to try and push myself up, but they’re being sucked into the mud at the lake bottom. My hands are stuck in the mud and I can’t get them out. Oh God, help me! I’m terrified!

I’m in a state of complete panic! Ice cold, black, unbearable panic!


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