By way of background, I am an Ivy-educated professional in the field of information technology. I've studied philosophy extensively in academic and other settings. Prior to my experience I was an agnostic with regard to the existence of God or other non-corporeal entities. My opinion on the matter was that reason and science are the only sources of knowledge, and science/reason has nothing to say on these matters and likely never will.
In early 2018 my ex-wife left me and took our then 9-month-old daughter (my first and only child). I fell into a deep depression; couldn't work; quit my job; and had to sell my house because I could no longer afford it. I decided instead to purchase a small camper, which I lived out of for approximately 6 months. Throughout my wandering in the woods, I felt an overwhelming sense of dread---almost too painful to even think about---that my daughter would never know me as her dad.
During a long drive home alone (approximately 11 hours) this dread began to overwhelm me. Suddenly I felt as though a golden light carrying an inaudible message struck me from above and slightly behind the left side of my head. The message in that light was, "You will be your daughter's dad." I was so overwhelmed by the peace and relief of this message that I doubled over and began sobbing and saying aloud, "Thank You," while driving.
I finished the drive in the evening. When I arrived home, I was exhausted, so I went to bed. As I lay supine, I began to feel an unfamiliar vibration throughout my body. Specifically, every part of my body touching the bed (my back, arms, legs, etc.) began vibrating. It continued and intensified for a few second, so I sat up partially to look at my body and see what was happening. At this point my back was off the bed at about a 30 deg angle to the ground. My legs still straight out in front of me.
When I opened my eyes (I was not asleep) I saw what I can only describe as a beam or string of lights (somewhat similar to a bundle of fiber optics). I can't remember the color, but I believe it was a combination of white, pink, and blue. The light was either flowing into or out of the spot on my forehead between my eyes, approximately 1cm above the bridge of my nose. The light flowed most of the length of my body and turned approximately 40 degrees to the left and continued in that direction.
Instinctively, I got on my knees and faced in the direction that light was flowing (to? or from?). When I did that, the vibrating in my body stopped, except for in my hands. At this point I began to feel overwhelmed and a little scared, so I threw myself back face-down on the bed. After I calmed down, I tried to go back to sleep, again in a supine position.
After several seconds or maybe a few minutes, I became aware of an entity floating about 5 feet in the air, slightly above, in front, and to the left of me. This entity was made of brilliant green-yellow light. The light appeared to be pouring forth from the entity. The closest physical description I can give would be of a female form in a seated meditative pose. Though there was movement in the entity in the sense of flowing or pouring light, the entity didn't change its position in the room.
I would estimate that the entity remained there for a few minutes (>5). The entity had a distinctly female feel to it, and my interaction with it was playful, loving, and very erotic. It felt very closely related to both my ex-wife and my daughter, and as the experience progressed I almost convinced myself that I was communicating with my ex-wife somehow.
While the entity was present, a couple other things happened, though it's hard for me to say what order they occurred or whether they were during or after the presence of the entity. In no particular order...
I felt as though I were in a small amphitheater (no visuals, just the feeling) surrounded by familiar people, some of whom I thought I recognized. (Note: All of the people whose presence I felt were alive at the time of the event.) The overwhelming sense I got from those present were messages of joy/elation that I had finally made it there; that I was loved; and that everything would be okay for everyone in the world.
I had an instantaneous flash of life review. It felt more spatial than sequential. The best way I can describe it is this: I've always been a pretty messy person. My life review took the form of a large disorganized room, and in that instant I was able to see how all the parts of my life were connected to one another. I could see and feel how I had hurt people I cared about out of my own carelessness. I felt a great sense of interconnectedness and oneness with everything in the universe. I no longer feared death because it was so patently obvious that death was illusory.
Prior to this experience I had an uncommonly deep fear of my own death. That fear had been intensified by my service in combat. This experience ended that fear, and it hasn't come back.
As a result of my experience, my understanding of the nature of the universe has changed entirely. It's now clear to me that the physical world we experience is part of something vastly more complex with facets that I never before would have believed possible. I became far more interested in being in nature and more interested in talking to and connecting with other people.