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The Fall From Mr M's Racehorse

I believe I was 16 years old (could have been 15, I can't exactly recall), and my best friend and I were riding my neighbors deceased husband's racehorses in their pasture.

The neighbor's husband had died a few years prior from a heart attack - only in his 50's. It was one of those beautiful spring days where it was both warm and chilly...one moment goosebumps; the next the warmth of the sun taking them away. I remember being so relaxed (like I could fall asleep in the saddle), and even though the horse I was riding was just a bit excited nothing felt out of hand as my horse followed my friends horse.

To this day I don't know what caused me to come off the horse and end up on the ground. DID I FALL ASLEEP and fall off (not likely)? Or did the horse jump or buck me off? I will never know as my friend was ahead of me and did not see how or why I ended up on the ground. Years later I learned, often when you have brain trauma/concussion you often don't remember what happened before the accident occurred. Anyhow, I don't believe I was unconscious for more than a minute or so...but the near-death experience of time was a bit more time. I remember seeing the bright light in the background and the foreground like a desert with tumble weeds. The light got brighter, closer, and wider as a form of a person was coming towards me (but kinda like looking at an overexposed picture where you can make out forms but not details).

Although, looking back on the experience, I never really saw the face and the voice was not a spoken voice, it was telepathic, but I knew who it was Mr. M who had passed a few years prior! He said to me, "I FELT COMPELLED I had to make a CHOICE and get off the fence 'to believe or not to believe in God and an afterlife.' It's not your time yet, go back."

The next thing I know I'm sitting up (consciously now but loopy) holding my ears shut with my fingers repeating "My brains are coming out of my ears, my brains are coming out of my ears." Of course, my girlfriend is now off of her horse and looking at me and laughing. I'm sure it looked funny and sounded funny but I did think my brains were coming out of my ears.

Normally, old school theory is when you get knocked off of the horse you get back on but I wasn't feeling well and I convinced her that we needed to put the horses up and I needed to go home. We walked a half a mile or so home. I didn't tell my friend or my mom the experience I had while unconscious. All I wanted to do was go to bed and sleep and I did (along with throwing up). Now looking back, I probably should have gone to the hospital but in my family you pretty much had to have an arm almost hanging off before you went to the hospital. Anyhow, years went by and I would think from time to time about that experience and I had told Mr M's widow of the experience I had. She believed in an afterlife and was a devout Christian... I could see it brought tears to her eyes in some sort of comfort. The experience to me was stronger than a dream and always puzzled me.

However, it wasn't until around the year 2007/2008 and I was now in my forties (I had been agnostic, borderline atheist...but I could never reconcile or deny the experience and the possibility it left me puzzled with) and a T.V. show called Beyond and Back about people who've had near-death experiences. Although many of the experiences were different, there were some similarities in some of the stories (bright light, deceased person telling you to go back...telepathically!). I now felt I had a name for what I experienced!

From 2007 to 2014 I would have these time periods of NAGGING to understand what I experienced and a spiritual realm(I would read and research from time to time online). In 2012, I was separated from my husband of 17 years. I proceeded to try numb my pain by going from one man to the next with devastating physical and emotional repercussions. Living my life the way I had been the last 35 years WAS NOT WORKING! In 2014, I started going to church. I believe this experience happened to me in order for me to keep a tad of faith open. I always felt that way.. And that's my NDE story!

It was with mixed emotions and puzzling for many years but I believe there was a purpose(s) as to why I had that experience. One so I would believe in something of a more spiritual nature. I have a feeling more also, but not sure yet what that purpose is.

I really wish I could find people to talk to that have experienced the same thing.

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