NDE Accounts

These NDE accounts were submitted to our website and are published here anonymously. Minor edits have been made to protect the identity of the experiencer and others who may have been involved with the experience. Note to researchers and authors: IANDS cannot grant permission to publish quotations from these NDE accounts because we have not received permission from the NDE authors to do so. However, we advise authors who wish to use quotations from these accounts to follow the Fair Use Doctrine. See our Copyright Policy for more information. We recommend adopting this practice for quotations from our web site before you have written your book or article.

I am the only God and my name means love 28 Jun 2020
Man who drowned as teen and was pulled out seeks answers later in life 30 May 2020
Woman, abused as infant, has NDE after-effects 14 May 2020
Greeted by vibrantly-colored spirit guides and guardian angels 09 May 2020
Young mother drowns in sailing accident 25 Apr 2020
The physical world we experience is part of something vastly more complex 19 Apr 2020
Childhood NDE and visitations finally understood after 50 years 19 Apr 2020
Man with childhood NDE is further activated by NDEs in his 60's 29 Mar 2020
Suicide beholds the essence of God as love and light 24 Mar 2020
Near-death soldier taken to past time where his soul is joined by another man 25 Feb 2020
Welsh woman is cared for in heavenly hospital while in coma 06 Feb 2020
Nurse, dead for 20 minutes, sees God but can't enter 05 Feb 2020
A lifetime: Brief moments of light when suddenly truth beams on us 27 Jan 2020
I was one with God consciousness 27 Jan 2020
Woman helps another cross over during NDE 22 Jan 2020
Multiple NDEr shares about wars in heaven and on earth 22 Jan 2020
Part 3: Lengthy NDE meets council, life review, return 26 Dec 2019
Part 2: Lengthy NDE learns of energies, Jesus, spirit city 26 Dec 2019
Part 1: Lengthy NDE learns of Egypt, Gaia, dark souls 26 Dec 2019
I felt like who I was always supposed to be 20 Dec 2019
GI almost dies, has painful life review and flies around the world 11 Dec 2019
Woman doing drugs leaves body, feels love and acceptance 11 Dec 2019
Young mother has OOB and conversation with being during surgery 11 Dec 2019
Teenager has OOB after drug overdose (caution: profanity) 11 Dec 2019
Man meets grandmother during panic attack near-death 11 Dec 2019
New Zealand girl learns from epilepsy near-deaths 13 Nov 2019
Teen wishes for death, but is shown who she really is 24 Oct 2019
Life Review: Exchanging Loving Kindness with All 07 Oct 2019
Begged to return to care for his babies 09 Sep 2019
Comparison of near-death and drug-induced experiences 09 Sep 2019
Troubling after-effects following aborted dark NDE 09 Sep 2019
I snapped back into my life as a different version of myself 22 Aug 2019
Young woman sees herself in the morgue 21 Jun 2019
Man visits hell hole after dying of sepsis 15 Jun 2019
Sleeping man goes to heavenly library but it's not his time 10 Jun 2019
New mother feels loved beyond comprehension 10 Jun 2019
Suicide attempt NDE followed by increased intuitiveness, etc. 19 Apr 2019
Scary spirits plague woman who drowned at age 3 19 Apr 2019
Life Review: Exchanging Loving Kindness with All 15 Apr 2019
Many experiences in and out of body, living with genetic syndrome 11 Apr 2019
Surfing accident reveals unknown mercy to young woman 09 Mar 2019
Brief out of body on ceiling of operating room 04 Mar 2019
Woman feels she's been given the meaning of life 04 Mar 2019
Young woman dies of a broken heart but now knows her friend lives 15 Feb 2019
Anti-theist youth hears God's voice 21 Jan 2019
Teen sees patient in adjacent room while out of her body 15 Jan 2019
The Most Important Assignment in Life is Love 11 Jan 2019
Mother's NDE and premonitions of children's deaths 08 Jan 2019
A connection to all the knowledge there is in the universe 26 Dec 2018
There is no "I" since five NDEs from age four 26 Dec 2018
My trip to hell; saved by a little angel 22 Nov 2018
Suddenly I remembered EVERYTHING - who I was, what my life was about, what home was 20 Nov 2018
Mother believed stabbed son was dying but chaplain didn't 03 Nov 2018
Teenager communicates with identical twin from coma/NDE 14 Oct 2018
Man's NDE at work allows him to help his mother cross over 14 Oct 2018
Childhood NDE followed by precognitive dreams/visions and UFO/alien writings 04 Oct 2018
The real world is much more wonderful and complex 17 Aug 2018
Unconditional love washed over me like a huge wave 01 Aug 2018
Fifteen-year-old girl has panoramic view of accident 30 Jul 2018
Apocalyptic vision during high fever 30 Jul 2018
Teenager in UK out of body into light 23 Jul 2018
Love was what everything was made of, came from, and returned to 14 Jul 2018
Saved from allergic reaction by otherworldly figure 02 Jul 2018
I now communicate with conscious-energies in the Energic Conscious Continuum 27 Jun 2018
Start over in another lifetime or continue on in this one? 14 May 2018
Saved by my beautiful tender soft wise cat 06 May 2018
I helped resuscitate another man while I was in a coma 29 Apr 2018
Tall spiritual being sat me on his knee 05 Apr 2018
New Zealand school girl meets mother figure in The Real Place 19 Mar 2018
Hit by a 122 rocket in Viet Nam 15 Mar 2018
Caesarean Section NDE in 1979 Scotland 07 Jan 2018
Don't move out of the light or you will never leave this place 28 Dec 2017
Tickled to meet man who said "Come" 28 Dec 2017
Two sleep apnea OBEs as a teenager 15 Dec 2017
Go and tell everyone that I love them! 14 Dec 2017
Mommy, why didn't you keep me? 14 Dec 2017
It held all the knowledge that ever was or will be 23 Nov 2017
I knew my own Separateness and also Oneness with every thing 21 Oct 2017
Encountering the Essence of Compassion 12 Oct 2017
Sees Jesus during bad trip 12 Aug 2017
Your heart stopped for a minute there, but we got you back 16 Jul 2017
Someday, my experiences will all add up and make sense 02 Jul 2017
I was told this life would be catastrophic 03 May 2017
OOB following suffocation (in German) 27 Apr 2017
I watched, not realising the body on the floor was mine 05 Apr 2017
Everything is Life 28 Mar 2017
The void, my grandmother, and God change the way I see life 18 Mar 2017
The older gentleman and his son were together again 18 Mar 2017
Out of body during asthma attack and later surgery 27 Feb 2017
It is here in our bodies that the lessons of love are made manifest 17 Feb 2017
I remember my brother screaming, though I was not breathing 08 Feb 2017
Everything is always how it's supposed to be 31 Jan 2017
Basking in a pool of love 25 Jan 2017
He would respect my decision either way 05 Jan 2017
It marked the trajectory of my life 05 Jan 2017
Love and avoid the rat race 05 Jan 2017
Tainted water leads to unconditional love 05 Jan 2017
Prayers Like Musical Notes 05 Jan 2017
I am a bird, and thus starts my life 16 Nov 2016
Golden skulls, people, stars, darkness 08 Nov 2016

Latest Entries

I am the only God and my name means love

When I was 11 years old, we were swimming at Fall Creek Falls in Tennessee when I fell asleep on a large boulder from which we were jumping off into the water. A person came up from behind me and pushed me in, not realizing I was asleep. I struggled and one person tried to save me but I pulled them under and they got away from me so … to the bottom I went.

When I stopped fighting, this unbelievable feeling of relief and peace came over me. I slowly left my body and it was harder for my spirit to move through the water than after I broke the surface, but then I was hovering over my body which was clearly on the bottom.

The next thing I remember, I was in a dark tunnel with a bright light at the end which I and my guide were approaching. There were many other unformed grey spirits like me and every one had a darker, slightly more formed, guide.

Suddenly I became aware of a hard-to-describe entity of pure light and inhuman love. I asked it, "Are you the Christian god I have been taught about?" The answer was, "I am the only God, and my name means love." I asked, "What should I do with my life?" Two giant black blocks of stone appeared with one word on each, HUSBAND   FATHER. I thought, "This seems like a big deal; should I tell people?" The answer was " no."

Suddenly it seemed like I appeared at the end of the tunnel nearest the light, and I was asked, "Will you stay or will you go back?" I replied, "I don't want to go back, but it would kill my mother so I will go back." The next thing I remember, my mother is pounding on my back and I am spitting up water. People there said I was under 3 or 4 minutes.

The most misunderstood two things about my NDE are: (1) Even though the words were literally written in stone:  FATHER  HUSBAND, it was made clear in my mind that this was only a possibility if I chose certain forks in my future, not predetermination, and (2) When the answer to "Should I tell people about this?" was "no," I had the vision of child preachers in front of a congregation in my head, not that I and/or others should not discuss NDEs.

Man who drowned as teen and was pulled out seeks answers later in life

When I was around fourteen years old, I went fishing with my older brother and his friend. We took a small boat out on to a river. The river waters were extremely high and fast-moving as it had been raining for two weeks straight. As soon as we launched the boat from the shoreline it immediately capsized. As I went over into the water, I was able to grab onto a seat cushion that fell into the water. It happened so fast as the water was pulling me down underneath rapidly. The seat cushion which was supposed to also serve as a flotation device was useless as I was clutching on to it. 

I was looking up as I was being pulled down and I could see the top of the water and a very small what appeared to be a hole of light from above getting smaller and smaller as I was being pulled down so fast I couldn't seem to move at all, just being pulled under. Two thoughts came to mind, as I was being pulled down - the seat cushion was not helping to save me, it was getting sucked down regardless, and I remember saying to myself in my mind - "I can't believe I am going to die like this, I'm only 14." At that point, everything went dark.

The next thing I can remember is looking up and seeing the overcast sky, I was soaking wet, lying on my back. My vision was not very clear, foggy like, confused, where was I, what was happening. As I was coming to my senses, I could hear my brother calling my name off in the distance. I called out to him. All I remember next was saying to him - (his first name) "You saved my life, thank you for saving my life and pulling me out of the water." He replied - "I didn't pull you out of the water, we've been running up and down the shoreline looking for you." We've had people looking for you for some time.

When he pulled me up from the ground, I turned to look at where I was. I had been lying in the branches of a large birch tree that was lying partially in the water’s edge downstream from where the boat capsized. We got in the car, didn't talk much. When I got home, I remember telling my Mom that (brother's first name) had saved me from drowning. 

My brother to this day doesn't know what happened and he insists that he did not pull me out. He found me lying on the tree. The incident seemed to have gone into the background of my life in the early years of my life. At times the memory would come up, I would struggle to make sense of it and then it would disappear again for years. In my later years, as a parent, I've struggled to fill in the missing pieces which were causing restlessness for answers, loss of sleep, questioning life.

Something seemed to have brought the incident to the forefront of my thoughts several years ago and it was difficult for me, replaying it out in my mind daily, what happened, how did I get out of the water - Who saved me? It's almost like I have a sense of someone having pulled me from the water. A hand reaching down into the water and pulling me out, telling me it was not your time.

The past year I've been getting more thoughts coming into my head that I was not following the course that I was supposed to. I was supposed to be helping people heal, overcome their challenges, fears, obstacles. Helping them find their path in life. Like I was given a second chance in life and now was the time to take care of business before it gets too late and I didn't accomplish what I was supposed to do. 

I've only recently told my children about my experience. I have actually come to peace with trying to find the missing time/events between going under and awakening. I've been in many sessions of searching and during one, a voice or thought clearly said to me - "You don't need to know the answer right now, it's not the time. Just know that you are here." 

Woman, abused as infant, has NDE after-effects

When I was approximately two years old, my father looked at me one day and decided he wanted to “be the first”. He raped me as an infant. Many years later, when he was beginning to show signs of dementia, someone spoke to him about how he should treat me. His response was, “She’s my daughter and I’ll do what I want with her,” and then proceeded to tell the above story (in more graphic detail). This came back to me more than a year after that conversation, and after he had passed.

I have no conscious memory of that event from my infancy. However, I have known since my 20s that something of that nature had happened to me. I knew it because my emotional and physical responses in certain situations were classic sexual-abuse-victim reactions. I knew it because of “cellular memory”: my body knew, even though my mind didn’t. I spent many years in therapy, reading, and self-evolutionary work, trying to figure it out, trying to remember what happened to me. It wasn’t until my father’s late-life “brag” (that was his point, to demonstrate his “rights”) was relayed to me that I finally had an answer. I was then in my 50s. But I still have no conscious memory of the event.

When I started attending the Tucson IANDS presentations, I was fascinated. To know what was on the other side, to hear others’ personal accounts, was at once uplifting and reassuring, intellectually engaging and emotionally supportive. I joined IANDS, and was further delighted to start receiving their “Monthly NDE” reports. Recently I came across a couple of them that really caught my attention.

One talked about NDEs in children, written by P.M.H. Atwater. She spoke of how “children compensate”. Rather than deal with their experience, they adjust other things around it; that even into mature years, the puzzle is often not solved. They “begin abstracting (dealing with broad conceptual ideas), are smarter than their parents, school teachers, friends”. “They forever miss HOME, the greater collective they know is real.” She says 90% are unable to bond with their parents. She continues: “Typical characteristics afterward: heightened senses, vivid imagination, intellectual curiosity and drive, psychic/intuitive, loneliness, higher I.Q., deep capacity to care, great potential for an ethical path, aware of future moments, strongly independent even if shy, nonlinear development. The younger the child, the greater the jump in I.Q., [and] the ability to abstract.” They are “doers with good ideas, inventions, and the energy to get jobs done”. They have a heightened consciousness, and a tendency to nerve-stomach-skin sensitivity.

These things all represent aspects of myself. I never felt particularly close to any of my family. (I’m not even sure what “bonding” with a parent might actually be.) I never thought I was smarter than average, until I had more experience with a broader range of people – and then it became clear to me: my comments were often over the heads of other people. My thoughts and ideas were often complex and fairly advanced in logic and principle, and went unnoticed (at best) or ridiculed (at worst). I am very resourceful and can often come up with unique ways to deal with a problem or situation. I am a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) as defined by Dr. Elaine Aron. I am intuitive and perceptive of people’s emotions and intentions. I can often “see” likely outcomes of present actions. I can often tell when someone is lying. I have a strong sense of history and how it connects everything, as well as my own participation in many time periods. I have had several Spiritually Transformative Experiences (STEs), mostly regarding my own past lives. And I have an awareness of a broader future for humanity and the planet.

A different Monthly NDE mentions the writer’s “excruciatingly painful awareness”, a “feeling of desolate isolation from my real existence”. I have always felt a deep, profound, and painful sadness, just from living on the physical plane, never feeling a part of this place, never feeling “at home”. I know things about how this life works that most other people don’t seem to be aware of, things in terms of personal interactions, repercussions, and energetic flow. At least, sometimes.

Other times I am clueless as to social norms and acceptable behaviors, or what some enigmatic comment is supposed to convey. And yet I was never able to utilize my sensitivities for anything other than personal evolution. It did not help me find jobs or friends, I never felt “successful”, either monetarily or socially. I have never had sufficient certainty of my ideas to help others by way of predictions or information regarding their own lives. All I can do is give my own thoughts and impressions as suggestions, and if they accept what I say, it may help them to understand their circumstances or make their own choices. Often, however, they do not. I sometimes feel like Cassandra of Greek mythology, cursed to give true prophecies which nobody ever believes.

In this second Monthly NDE, the writer says she has no memory of the experience, she simply “knew” that she had been on another plane of existence, and had been forced or somehow persuaded to return to her physical body. This really woke me up. “Having no memory of the experience” is the same way I describe my own sexual assault: I have no conscious memory of it, yet I “know” it happened. This led me to what felt like a revolutionary concept: perhaps I had, as a result of rape at a very early age, left my body and experienced an NDE. For reasons at which I can only guess, my memory of the physical event and my retreat out of my body – and whatever happened on the other side – had been erased. I would guess that this was done to protect me and help me survive.

The emotional pain, shyness, reluctance to socialize, constant anxiety, and fear for my protection and future have been with me as long as I can remember. I have always known that I had to take care of myself, I could rely on nobody else for my physical, mental, or emotional wellbeing. Over the course of more than 60 years, that intuition has been borne out, and continues to be true.

I have always had a deep need and respect for the truth, beyond what most others would act on, even to my own detriment in terms of money or personal cost. If you don’t have truth, I felt, you don’t have anything. My mother’s description of me, as told to the mother of a friend of mine, was “very independent”.

Despite crippling shyness, I was compelled to utilize my musical talents in singing and acting. I have a number of stomach/digestive issues, and I am physically very sensitive. (I.e., things that are very painful to me would go unnoticed by many.) I have always tried to help others, though my efforts were often misunderstood. I feel a visceral pain at cruelty or subjugation of any kind, to anyone, whether I know them or not. I have always championed the underdog in most any situation or society at large, including (especially!) the animal kingdom.

My empathic abilities seem to be very sharp, yet indistinct. I can be overwhelmed by feelings that often make no sense to me, if I happen to notice. More often, I get totally lost in the emotion and react to that, and I don’t notice that it likely comes from people or circumstances around me. This is complicated by my own, often very strong, emotions. It took me decades to realize this was happening, and I am still learning how to differentiate and identify sources (me or not-me).

I describe this laundry list of “after-effects” as the only evidence of my NDE. It may seem like I’m jumping to conclusions, but that is the nebulous nature of my attributes and abilities. I have only my intuition to go on. It may sound self-absorbed, yet that seems to be my purpose here in this lifetime. My constant goal throughout my life has been to improve myself as a human being and increase my spiritual awareness. Everything else was secondary. (I was once told by a numerologist that I was hoping to make this my last incarnation.) For the most part, the only real achievements I have made during my life have been in introspection, self-realization, and personal evolution. And perhaps those are no small achievements. So, make of it what you will. If my story helps anyone else in their own journey, that will be a whole new kind of success for me.

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