Peace Despite Difficult Life

Print
E-mail

On December 1, 1986 I was in a head on collision with a drunk driver. I think my coma was induced because of severe bleeding of my face. I had a closed head injury and was told my brain tripled in size. Due to swelling, they couldn't perform a CAT scan until three days after the accident. I don't remember anything.  The first year after the accident is like a blur. I am now divorced. My communication skills are not as good. I'm much more irresponsible. I've had trouble working. I hear voices when I’m stressed. The voices make me crazy, like it’s me physically but someone else acts out. I hear voices of faith. I listen real hard. It’s beautiful at times but the average person thinks I'm crazy. I've been with mental health since the year 2000. They say I'm schizophrenic. I take Zoloft. They had me on Haldol and then switched me to Abilify. When I was in a coma I was in a place of peace detached from anything earthly and it was the most beautiful peace that cannot be described here on earth. Since my accident my life is very difficult. I've changed personality wise. I had a frontal lobe injury. I'm trying to get disability benefits. I can't hold a job. I've been denied once but I've just submitted another application. It’s not normal in the eyes of most people. I consider it a blessing because our creator showed me a piece of heaven so I came back with that peace!

Latest Entries

A Burst of Light amid Violence

In December 1979 I awoke and found a male assailant beside my bed, and unfortunately I did not have my glasses on. When I sat up, the assailant put his hands around my throat and as I struggled, his grip became harder until I passed out.

Read more...
 
Two Brushes Unnoticed

I drowned when I was five years old. I choked on water at first, then stopped fighting it and felt fine. I marveled at the beauty of the green water and colors of the fish, and watched calmly as their mouths opened and shut as they swam by or bumped into me. Then I rose to the top of the water. I could either look beneath or over it, or go up. I went up in the sky and hovered over the pond. I saw my mom and sister on a blanket sunbathing and talking. I saw my brother at the edge of the pond; he was on my board that I had been floating on. That’s what caused me to drown. I could only dog paddle, and I used the board to get out in the middle of the pond, when he took it I sunk. As I hovered and watched them, I was angry that I had died and no one even noticed.

Read more...
 
The Fastest Roller Coaster Ride Ever

While in a coma, I remember being sent through a tube. It felt like I was on a roller coaster except this ride was much faster. I say “sent” because it was a surprise; I didn't feel like I made a choice to enter the ride. It was as real as any amusement park ride I've ever been on. I never felt like I was in danger. I remember that it took me through various events of my past, such as times I spent at my grandparents’ house during my youth. I remembered going to the corner store to buy wrestling magazines and then walking back to their house.

Read more...