Massive Infinite Entity

Print
E-mail
I was on vacation at Lake Powell and rented a two-story houseboat for one week. On the last day of the trip we decided to go down the swim slide that was 10 feet from the top of the second story. I went down the slide 18-feet and fell into a rock, which shattered my tibia, fibula, and tibia plateau in eight places--a compound fracture. I was airlifted by helicopter to a trauma center where I spent eight months. At the center, they put me into emergency surgery the next day to rebuild my calf with metal and screws. Three days later I came down with compartment syndrome, but the doctors missed it (funny as my calf was the size of a basketball at the time). A nurse brought a doctor in and begged him to do something as I was looking pretty bad and she claimed she thought I was going to be in real trouble if he didn't. Later, they brought me into ultra sound where they discovered that the blood flow had stopped circulating into my leg (killing my anterior muscle from lack of blood flow), and hence not circulating around my body at that time.

The doctor and my fiancée rushed me down the hall into emergency surgery. I closed my eyes for a moment. All of a sudden I was off the planet and floating way above the earth, although I could feel it behind me. I was looking into a star field--a massive, infinite entity that encompassed all of the galaxies, all of space, and some presence which is right in front of us all of the time that the earth sits in. It was massive and unimaginable. And, I had the thought that all of the dark matter and dark energy in the whole of the void was God. I was overwhelmed by the size of this presence. I understood that it knew everything about me as if it had built me cell by cell.

I felt the earth behind me. I realized it was seething with life, an ocean of blue and white froth waves being life and teaming with it. Then I didn't hear a voice, but rather I was asked a question by this entity. It told me if I wanted to come out now I could, or I could go back. No voice, but I felt the question in a big way. I thought of my life and fiancée and decided to go back. Right then I opened my eyes and was still on the rolling gurney, almost in the very same spot as if no time had passed at all. I leaned up and told my fiancée that I didn't think I was going to make it, and goodbye. The doctor started running and pushing the gurney into surgery.

When I woke from surgery many hours later, I had the strangest thought that we are all floating around in a gas. Where we are going, there is no gas and everything is crystal clear, like diamonds. Here we are looking through a foggy gas, kind of like when it is very hot and you see those heat waves on a road as you drive. That is what it looks like here.

My fiancée said when I first woke up I told him that I wasn't baptized (strange since I had no religious beliefs). Anyway, compartment syndrome was a very serious life-threatening event and I had no clue that I was dying at the time nor did I have any religious beliefs.

Latest Entries

The Light Within

My father had died a few months before. We had a many issues between us, and it was very difficult to let him go. I refused to leave his side while he was dying, as if to make up for all the things that happened while he was alive.After his death I experienced grief. Wow, I never knew it would feel like that! I forgot how to do my job or relate to other people. I had a hard time acting and feeling normal, but I managed to get by.

Read more...
 
Everything is Love

One evening, I was talking with a friend on the phone who knew that I was interested in exploring different spiritual practices and religions. He said, "Hey, you should check out a Society of Friends meeting. They don't have any sermons and just meditate for an hour or so together." I was intrigued and after we hung up I looked them up on the Internet. I found out that they were what I knew as "the Quakers" and after only a few minutes of searching, came across a posting that explained a style of meditation they do called "Looking for the light within." I printed it out, took it to my bed and read what it said. It was very simple: Get into a comfortable position, close your eyes, focus your attention on the darkness and look for a light within. When you see a light, focus on it. So that's exactly what I did.

Read more...
 
NDE in Pre-Term Labor

I was in the hospital with pre-term labor. The physician on duty administered turbutaline (brethine) intravenously. Within seconds, I didn't feel right, grew very hot and had barely said "Something doesn't feel right" when I blinked out of my normal version of consciousness and blinked into the void. The medication stopped my heart (I later learned). I was in a vast dark place that was quite peaceful. I wasn't sure where I was but knew that I was fully conscious and no longer in my body. I tried to wiggle my toes and fingers but discovered I had none. I knew I existed in only pure consciousness.

Read more...