Childhood Imaginary Friend/NDE Guide

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From ages three to eight, I had an "imaginary" friend I named Mr. Cardine. He would take me to places outside my body and tell me what was going to happen to me and other family members. I could also see other beings, but I could not see Mr. Cardine. When I would be out of my body, I could see people having conversations and I could listen to their plans. It was very hard to understand why other people did not believe me when I would tell them what was going to happen.

Mr. Cardine was very friendly and never frightened me. I thought everyone knew Mr. Cardine and I would talk about him to everyone. Soon I was the target of ridicule and bullying because nobody believed my stories or that I had an "imaginary" friend. My mother got frightened because I was telling her things that happened and were going to happen. Her concern for my behavior prompted her to go to a preacher in the Holiness denomination and he began to tell me that Mr. Cardine was not real. I would tell him things about his life and he told mother to take me to a doctor.

The doctor told me to kill Mr. Cardine and my parents wanted me to tell them when he dies. One day while I was talking to some of the other beings, mother got angry and gave me a spanking and then dad did the same when he got home. Mr. Cardine was the main being in that realm of existence. He could make all the others leave. I could not hear his voice or see him; it was a presence I would feel and the communication was verbal on my part, but I am not sure how I understood him.

I would see many other beings too. Some of them looked like melted piles of tar and I was very afraid of them. They were able to move through walls and I could tell that they had no boundaries, as I knew boundaries. I remember their presence mostly when my parents were arguing or drinking and arguing. Mr. Cardine could make the tar-like beings leave.

The last time I was aware of Mr. Cardine was the day I had to tell my parents he had fallen off the roof, broke his leg and died. He told me to do this and said he would always be with me but I could not talk to him anymore because of the beatings my parents started giving me when they caught me talking to him.

Fast forward to my 39th year. It was 1995 on July 14th that my life changed. I had been breaking out in hives for 21 years and I didn't know what caused it. I ate a peanut butter sandwich and five minute later I could feel the hives starting. One hive was below my navel and it was worse than any hive I had ever had. In the mirror I watched the hive move around my body in a circle that ended back at the origin of the hive. At that time my body felt as if it was on fire. I knew I needed to get to the hospital immediately.

When I got to the hospital I was very faint feeling and I walked in the ambulance door and the staff nurse told me to go to admissions and fill out the forms. I told her I could hardly stand up anymore and requested a wheel chair. After arguing for a few minutes she agreed to take my information. I was seated in front of her and after a few questions I told her I needed to lie down. I heard her saying something and I laid on the floor.

The next thing I knew I was floating above my body and watching it as people were giving me CPR. I heard a voice that said, "Why have you worried so much in your life?" I looked at my body again. The voice said, "What good is it now?" I turned to see who was talking and the ceiling was not a barrier to me anymore. I went through to the outside and I looked in the night sky for the voice's origin. I did not recognize it at first and I found myself focused on a star. The star started to get large and I was enveloped in its light. I looked toward the source of the light and saw the light was coming from a core of colors that were in an oval shape and swirling around in beautiful patterns. Somehow the colors started to form a space and I knew I was supposed to go in that space. I then recognized the voice as it said, "Here is your assured home you built while you were living. Have you finished everything you want in this life?" I thought about my woodcarvings that were not finished. I found myself back in my body that instant.

I could feel the weight of the nurse sitting on my chest and compressing my heart. I said, "What in the hell am I doing back here?" I was then moved to a cubical with a doctor. He started inserting tubes into my arm and talking to me. He asked me, "How are you feeling?" and to stay awake and not close my eyes. I relaxed and I heard the voice of Mr. Cardine. He said, "This is what happens to evil people." Then I saw a man I had never seen before. He had a look of terror in his eyes that seemed to convey that he saw where he was going and why. He then turned to a cloud of light that was colorful light swirling about in the center of the cloud. I suddenly saw one of the tar-like beings and the cloud formed a point that drew the whole cloud into the tar-like being. I saw a woman do the same and several others came in rapid succession. Mr. Cardine said, "This will happen to your mother." I awoke suddenly on the stretcher with the doctor yelling for me to hang on. He said, "You have to hang on, don't close your eyes." I said, "What in the hell am I doing back here again."


I was on the stretcher and a moment later Mr. Cardine said, "We are going on a journey." I saw the composition of the ceiling materials and I found myself moving in darkness. I wasn't afraid because Mr. Cardine was there. We came upon something I do not know how to describe other than to say it was the largest thing I ever knew. It was alive and knew I was there. It was communicating with Mr. Cardine but I could not understand them. We started moving again and suddenly we stopped in the presence of another larger being, larger than the first. They both turned from each other and looked at me. I have never felt anything so good. I felt love. I tried to say something but I was not able to communicate at all. Mr. Cardine and I were suddenly moving and the last thing I heard him say was, "You have chosen life. You will suffer as you help others."

I awoke to the doctor's yelling for me to hold on and wake up. He was slapping me and I said, "What in the hell am I doing back here?"

Since that experience I am not afraid to die. I am in no hurry to die but I want to go back to that plane of existence. I feel the more I help others, my next home will be better.

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